Tonight I write in memory of Renae Frame Hudson. She was one of the most beautiful, amazing souls I can remember from childhood/teenage years. Cancer took her life this evening.
And also tonight, I sat at Nelson Fine Art Center in Johnson City, TN to be entertained by friends in what they call the Dada Cabaret. I was entertained, but as with all theatre and good writing, my soul was nourished. We also talked about cancer tonight. We also heard about a woman dying of cancer, surrounded by her family. Very different circumstances. In fact, one death was reality and the other imagination, but both truth.
And last night, in the middle of the night, I woke and couldn't go back to sleep. I found a post linking me to a transcript with Steve Jobs Stanford University speech. There is a beautiful video as well. Here are a few portions of the speech that kept me awake last night (and again tonight).
"When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something. (cont. below) Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure — these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart....
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true. Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition....
....Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. Thank you all very much."
See more at: http://www.ouramazingworld.org/life/dont-listen-to-other-peoples-advice-words-of-wisdom-for-every-generation
For a few days now, Renae's community has been writing through facebook words of support and love. People have shared beautiful stories of Renae's spirit, her life, and her love. And people have also shared scripture as they share the hope of resurrection of the body and the hope of eternal life. These are all Christian beliefs, beliefs that I mostly share with this community.
Even as a Pastor, someone inspired by both Renae and her husband Chad- my youth minister as a middle school kid, even I have doubts about what is beyond. Not because I don't believe there is a kingdom of heaven somewhere or that God doesn't exist, but because we focus so much of our energy on what is beyond, what happens after death. Yes, many of us believe it will be wonderful, there will be freedom. Phyllis Tickle, one of our greatest theologians of this time, just passed away this week from, yes, cancer. She speaks about her near death experience as a young adult- and how that shaped her to never fear death again.
While many deaths I've witnessed have been incredibly beautiful and peaceful, still yet there are many that hold on. For some of us, the scriptures just aren't enough. For some of us, stories of near-death isn't enough. We forget about this life we have here. And so I do wonder if we were to live into the motto to stay hungry, stay foolish that we might model the greatest saints. We might find that our divine light shines through so others call and see us as beautiful. I wonder if we will forget that we have absolutely nothing in life that is worth holding onto if it is not the parts that make up the sum of our heart. It's what Phyllis Tickle describes as #freedom. The video of her is not after her cancer diagnosis. This video is a few years old, when she was living-- healthy as she knew at the time. She was living in freedom before she knew death would be coming.
http://www.theworkofthepeople.com/tickle-on-her-death-bed
So Renae, thank you for sharing your freedom in life and in death with the world. Your light shines even now. We are angry, we are sad, we are confused, hurt, and pissed. We also share the wonder, and the mystery of death and resurrection. And we are reminded to love and follow our heart. Thank you for living and dying with so much beauty that we can make way for the new in our lives. May you rest in peace, beautiful soul.
No comments:
Post a Comment